The diary entry that tried to kill me part 4

Lost souls lost

When we came out of the cube we decided that we would go to the park (lost souls that we are, we had trouble finding our way in) and have a drink, Agent mulder for her part was undecided as to weather this would be a coffee or a beer, for my part I choose and will always when offered something alcoholic and something non alcoholic, choose the alcoholic beverage, the beer in this case, or, if you will lager. So we went to a small nearby pub or perhaps it was a bar it certainly looked young and hip, at least vaguely so, so perhaps it was a bar not that it matters, as they told us that they didn’t have a license to sell drinks to be consumed of the premises so we went away empty handed, I said that we should maybe just get the drinks and sit on the benches outside the pub but I’m not sure Agent mulder heard me or maybe agent mulder miss understood me and in any case I didn’t really care that much, so we went and sat in the park for a while. We listened to some of my music that I had on my phone, Agent mulder said she liked it but then I don’t think she'd say that she didn’t, tellingly enough she said that it would send you insane if you listened to it for too long. Also before we were quite in the park we saw a police horse and I commented at how strange it was to see a live animal after just having seen five or so dead ones in formaldehyde, I don’t remember weather Agent mulder agreed or not.

A short discourse on the nature of life and freedom.

It has been said throughout history, that no one is truly free, the reason used to be fate then it was divine intervention and predetermination now its genetics and parenting, meaning, basically, that how we turn out as adults, what we end up doing, and the sort of opinions that we end up formulating on any number of subjects, are predetermined by a combination of
our genetic code, and the way that we are treated as children, and how we are raised by our parents.
It seems to me that if we don’t really have freedom, and I’m not saying that this is true, then this concept, ‘freedom’ then, does not actually exist, and as such we should either stop using it, or we should redefine the word, so that it actually describes a faculty or an attribute that is possessed by some people but not by others, after all if everyone possesses an attribute then it becomes as meaningless a concept to speak of as it would be, if it, as I have already said, was a attribute possessed by no one. This is true for many perhaps all concepts, including life itself, after all, persons who are dead, not that they should any longer be considered to be persons, seeing as they are no longer able to possess any of the attributes of a living person, as well as not possessing any other living attribute they do not possess the attribute of life.
My own personal opinion on all of this, is that we may be predetermined to be certain sorts of people, but as those different types of people we can choose to do anything, to say anything, and to think anything, though we may have a predilection towards doing, saying, and thinking certain things we can choose not to do, say, though not necessarily think them, that perhaps being the limit of freedom, that though we may be able to think as we wish to we cannot stop ourselves from thinking anything in particular. My definition of freedom then, would be the ability, not possessed by all, to go against ones own predilections, and in fact to create, or indeed change, or rather modify ones own nature. I see no other possible definition.